December 2019 - My labour started evening of December 8th, I went to the hospital afternoon of December 9th and gave birth at 2 a.m on December 10th. I didn't sleep the night before labour the second night was spent in labour and after baby was born I didn't sleep from anxiety as I was alone with baby, and eventually crashed for a while. The care I received during labour I have no complaints about but postpartum a lot went wrong. I think mostly what it stemmed from is no one really cares about the mom after baby is born and the hospital I was at is pro breastfeeding and what they call baby friendly.
First of all, being a hospital that promotes breastfeeding I feel I should have received assistance with breastfeeding immediately after the birth of my child. I didn't know what I was doing, how to hold my child, how to know if he's feeding properly what to look for etc..... if I was given that assistance the first time I fed him I could have been confident.
I didn't know what I was doing, my baby was rooting but not latching and I was told that's ok he will get the hang of it. The timing of my birth made it inconvenient for my family members to be there for me, I was left alone with a newborn as a first time mom with no breastfeeding experience. I was so dead, and I could hardly move after I had a very long and difficult labour and I was told feed baby every 2 hours and change diapers, most other hospitals and from all the friends I have spoken too were given much more support and also shown how to change diapers. This did not happen for me.
When I was transferred to my recovery room, it was a semi private room and it was empty when I went. The heat was completely turned off in that room it was really cold, remember my baby's birth was in December, even the nurse commented and said she would ask them to turn the heat on. Do you think that's appropriate conditions for a newborn to stay in, he was just swaddled in a blanket and hat, I didn't have clothes for him as my hospital bag was at home. The next day it was same thing, it was cold again. I don't know if the room was really drafty or the heating was faulty. My baby's bassinet was also put close to the window side where it was colder. My baby was not waking every 2 hour for feeds and now that I think of its probably because he was cold. I told the night nurse he's not waking every 2 hours, she said it was ok if he skipped a feed. The nurse I had that day realized my baby's temperature is low and made me do skin to skin, he was not warm enough to be bathed. That day went the same he was not waking every 2 hours, we would try to wake him and he would not wake.
Later on when my mother and mother in law came they realized it's colder by the window side, so we clothed him. When the lactation consultant saw him clothed the next day she made us take of his clothes because babies feed better without clothes. I moved my baby's bassinet that first night away from the window side.
The second night my baby kept crying, I would keep feeding him and he would not be satisfied. I ringed for a nurse and I was told he's just a newborn and to do skin to skin. change his diaper and feed him. I even mentioned I think he's not getting enough, later another nurse weighed him and because he had pooped they taught he's fed well. That whole second day he continued this continuous crying where he never seemed satisfied no matter how much I tried feeding him, his diaper also had these red, orange colours in it from his urine and the nurse that day told us its normal for newborns to have urate crystals. I had also told that nurse about him being really fussy and not getting satisfied but it was just dismissed as cluster feeding. I trusted the staff to know best, I should have followed my gut feelings. He was starving that's why he kept crying and his red in his diaper was an indication of dehydration. They should have been able to piece that together or at least asked more questions, taken it seriously if someone was concerned about their baby not getting enough milk. On top of that they also found in his bloodwork that he had borderline jaundice.
We were not given adequate info on how to deal with jaundice that its really important he gets all his feeds, we should have been offered formula or they should have suggested it instead of just promoting breastfeeding. We had to be readmitted after going home that same week because by day 4 my baby had lost 15% of his birth weight. His fussiness continued when we were home, his urate crystals and dark urine continued at home and when we went back he needed phototherapy for his jaundice as it had went up high. Our having to come back into special care nursery could have been avoided and breastfeeding could have been maintained if we had received proper care and attention.
I also had to pay the difference for that semi private room because my insurance didn't cover the entire expense, I payed for a room that was inadequately heated, that made my newborn sleepy.
I suffered, my newborn suffered, and because I couldn't breastfeed properly after this experience I suffered mentally for months over the guilt of what happened to my baby and my inability to breastfeed. If we were just given the chance to offer him a formula feed at the hospital to see if that satisfied him it would have made a world of a difference and it would have saved me from all the anxiety and sleep that I lost trying to feed my baby constantly. But because this hospital promoted breastfeeding they are against supplementing, breastfed is not what's always best, a baby should be fed and they should have helped ensure that even if that means offering formula. My friends have told me for them, they were encouraged to pump, breastfeed and their babies were offered formula at other hospitals.
The staff should be better trained to look out for these signs that baby is not getting enough like overly sleepy, constant fussiness, dark urine, urate crystals, not being satisfied, the mom constantly feeding. They should be giving moms the choice for formula if they think their babies are not getting enough or even suggesting it. It can be used in combination with pumping to keep supply up and especially for babies with jaundice the feeds are really important as that's what flushes the bilirubin out of their systems.
When I pre registered for the hospital, I was given no info by staff, there was nothing indicated in the info book given about support people after birth. like are we allowed to have someone stay with us overnight, that would have made a difference if they had let us know or suggested that some one stay after to help because that's what they expected for the mom to do it all on their own.
I just recently wrote in detail to patient relations, I emailed them my concerns and suggestions.
Formula is not a poison and breastfed is not always best. Being stubborn about exclusive breastfeeding is not the way to go, if this had gotten any worse and his jaundice had gotten higher it could have led to brain damage or worse he could have perished from lack of nutrition. I feel like supplementing even if it be in the beginning is sometimes necessary to maintain breastfeeding and especially for cases of jaundice its better to be safe than sorry, so please don't feel pressured to exclusively breastfeed. Please read up on breastfeeding and formula preparation before the birth of your baby. I went in knowing nothing, I didn't know things could go wrong. I wish so badly I had gotten formula beforehand for just in case.
Submitted Anonymously
